5 Steps to Build Unwavering Confidence in Your Intuition

Unlock Your Inner Guidance

“Faith is a withholding of conclusion so that you allow what is to arise.”

~ Adyashanti

The most expressed desire that my clients bring to me is to have more confidence in their intuition. They ask, “How do I know which voice in my head is my intuition, and how do I quiet the other voices in my head”?

So, today, I will muse on five steps to building and cultivating confidence you can depend on in all aspects of your life.

Before we proceed, however, I’d like to revisit who exactly is in our heads.

We often attribute our doubtful voices to external forces; in reality, we may even have people and systems in our lives that speak to fear and doubt. One example is a well-meaning (“worried”) family member who fears that we will follow our intuition off a steep cliff in an attempt to fly.

But, for the sake of this letter, let us agree that the most usual and familiar culprit in our heads is our well-cultivated doubt, otherwise known as lack of faith and trust. These are the tried and true voices that interfere and take every opportunity to stop us in our tracks.

“Doubt everything. Find your own light.”

~ Buddha

These steps will build confidence in your ability to make decisions based on your intuition and support you so that flight, fight, and fawn become less habitual. We must go inward on an expedition to know ourselves so that we can calm doubt and expand trust.

BECOME (RE) ACQUAINTED WITH YOURSELF
In this step, we step back and become aware or awake to ourselves. We take the time to get to know ourselves and all of the various voices in our minds. We all have many voices in our heads, and without awareness, the loudest, most fear-based voice generally prevails. How do we become acquainted? We practice meditation, becoming a witness to our thoughts, not to stop, change, or regulate the thoughts but to build awareness that they are there. It is as simple as taking time each day to sit and know what you are thinking.

DEEPEN YOUR AWARENESS
This step is simply a deepening of the above. We cultivate a steadfast relationship with ourselves and our thoughts with continued meditation practice. (Remember, we do not wish to get rid of thoughts; we merely witness them.) As we do this regularly, space begins to develop, which allows for a deeper understanding and an awareness of a somatic correlation with our thoughts. If we can simply (simple, not easy) stay with ourselves, a beautiful relationship begins to develop. A knowing begins to come upon us as we are willing to be with ourselves fully, steadfastly, and with kindness.

CONTEMPLATION
With the ability to be aware of your mind and to cultivate the mind-body connection, we now sprinkle in the idea of Spirit. We sit in meditation with awareness, steadfastness, kindness, and now curiosity. No longer are we afraid of, or attempting to, bat away the thoughts, feelings, and sensations that arise. We now have begun to witness the truth of ourselves. We have a clearer view and a sense of knowing that “just is.” This truth shows itself in the way of feeling or sensing spaciousness. This space allows us to listen to something beyond our thoughts, feel something beyond our body, and sense something beyond us altogether.

INSPIRED ACTION
So, how does this help in day-to-day decisions, big and small? Through daily meditation practice, you will have built up the muscle of stillness and space. Like any ability that you cultivate, it becomes second nature. (A great reminder here is that stillness and non-action are actions, and we practice ‘being’ over ‘doing.’)

This space becomes a part of us, and our intuition has a clear, unobstructed voice and resonance in our lives. What I love about having this ability to discern and play in the realm of using my intuition is that I get to choose and experiment while awake to what I am doing. I am always graced with an experience that brings with it the opportunity to align me, regardless of the choice I make. (Thank you, Spirit)

BE
As we expand and cultivate our meditation practice, we begin to navigate life with our intuition based on faith, filled with ease and equanimity. The repetition of witnessing, getting to know, contemplating, and acting with inspiration builds confidence that cannot be found in a book. We are building credibility with ourselves and an ability steeped in all of our wisdom.

“Meditation is a process of lightening up, of trusting the basic goodness of what we have and who we are, and of realizing that any wisdom that exists, exists in what we already have. We can lead our life so as to become more awake to who we are and what we’re doing rather than trying to improve or change or get rid of who we are or what we’re doing. The key is to wake up, to become more alert, more inquisitive, and curious about ourselves.

~Pema Chodron

As we wrap up here, you may wonder where the how-to part is. This letter is not so much a how-to as it is a what-to, and the answer to what to do is meditation.

So, how long and how often “should” we meditate?

Most teachers and mindfulness experts say that at least 15 minutes twice daily is optimal.

I recommend you go to your seat twice a day for as many minutes as you can. That could be two, five, ten, or more. Start where you are and expand from there.

If you have struggled to begin or sustain a regular practice in the past, here are some tips that I have heard and used along the way:

• Sit in the same place and at approximately the same time(s) within your day. After just a few days, simply moving into that space will tell your body and mind it is time to “si” i” meditation.
• Reach out to a friend, ask them to be your accountability buddy, and start a practice together.
• Save your morning coffee or another pleasurable ritual until after your meditation.
• Download an app such as Insight Timer that tracks your time.
• You can add meditation sessions to your to-do list. (Most of us love checking things off our lists.)

In the words of Jon Kabati-Zinn, “It” is indeed a radical act of love to sit down and be quiet for a time by yourself.”

Drop me a comment, and let me know how you get on with this. If you need an accountability buddy, I would be honored to be a part of your radical act of love for yourself.

Like what you’ve read? Subscribe here to get weekly musings and practices, much like this, in your inbox, or check out my Spiritual & Wellness Yoga Retreats here.