5 Steps to Build Confidence in Your Intuition

“Faith is a withholding of conclusion so that you allow what is to arise.” ~Adyashanti

Today’s topic is probably the most expressed desire that my clients bring to me. It is the wish to have more confidence in their intuition and/or the ability to listen to their intuition over the other “voices” in their head.

So my intention is to dive into 5 simple steps to building and cultivating confidence you can depend on in all aspects of your life. Before we proceed, however, let’s revisit who exactly is in our head.

We often attribute our doubtful voices to external forces, and in reality, we may even have people and systems in our life that do speak to fear and doubt. One example is a well-meaning “worried” family member who is fearful that we will follow our intuition, quit our job and end up homeless.

BUT, for the sake of this letter, let us agree that the most common culprit is our own doubt (or lack of trust). And let’s move forward empowered in knowing the voices that we hear are our very own, perhaps egged on and fueled externally, but truly they are ours.

“Doubt everything. Find your own light.”
~ Buddha

So how do we build confidence in our ability to make decisions based on our intuition and not freeze or act from fear? First and foremost, we must go inward on an expedition to know ourselves to the point that we can calm (not banish) doubt and expand trust.

BECOME (RE) ACQUAINTED WITH YOURSELF
In this step, we take a step back and become aware or awake to ourselves. We take the time to get to know ourselves and all of the various voices of our minds. We all have many voices in our heads, and without awareness, the loudest, most fear-based voice generally prevails. How do we become acquainted? We practice meditation, becoming a witness to our thoughts, not to stop, change or regulate the thoughts but to build awareness that they are there. As simple as taking time each day to sit and know you are thinking.

GET TO KNOW YOURSELF BETTER
This step is simply a deepening of the above. With continued meditation practice, we cultivate a steadfast relationship with ourselves and our thoughts. (Remember, we are not wishing to get rid of the thoughts, we are merely witnessing them). As we do this on a regular basis, space begins to develop that allows for a deeper understanding and an awareness of a somatic correlation with our thoughts. If we can simply (simple, not easy) stay with ourselves, a beautiful relationship begins to develop. A knowing begins to come upon us as we are willing to be with ourselves fully, steadfastly, and with kindness.

CONTEMPLATION
With the ability to be aware of your mind and to have cultivated the mind-body connection, we now sprinkle in the idea of spirit. We sit in meditation with awareness, steadfastness, kindness, and now curiosity. No longer are we afraid of, or attempting to, bat away the thoughts or the feelings and sensations that arise. We now have begun to witness the truth of ourselves. We have a clearer view and a sense of knowing that “just is.” This truth shows itself in the way of feeling or sensing spaciousness. This space allows us to listen to something beyond our thoughts, feel something beyond our body and sense something beyond us all together.

INSPIRED ACTION
So how does this help in the day-to-day decisions, big and small? Well, through daily meditation practice, what you have done is built up the muscle of stillness and space. Like any ability that you cultivate, it becomes second nature. (A great reminder here is that stillness and non-action is an action, and we practice being overdoing.)

This space becomes a part of us, and our intuition has a clear, unobstructed voice and resonance in our life. What I love about having this ability to discern and play in the realm of using my intuition is that I get to choose and experiment while awake to what I am doing, and I am always graced with an experience that brings with it the opportunity to bring me into alignment, regardless of the choice I make. (Thank you, Spirit)

BE
As we expand and cultivate our meditation practice, we begin to navigate life with our intuition, based on a faith that is filled with ease and equanimity. The repetition of witnessing, getting to know, contemplating, and acting with inspiration builds confidence that cannot be found in a book. We are building credibility with ourselves and an ability steeped in all of our wisdom.

“Meditation is a process of lightening up, of trusting the basic goodness of what we have and who we are, and of realizing that any wisdom that exists, exists in what we already have. We can lead our life so as to become more awake to who we are and what we’re doing rather than trying to improve or change or get rid of who we are or what we’re doing. The key is to wake up, to become more alert, more inquisitive, and curious about ourselves.

~Pema Chodron

As we wrap up here, you may be wondering where the how-to part is. This article is not so much a how-to as it is a what to do, and the answer to what to do is meditation.

So how long and how often “should” we meditate?

Most teachers and mindfulness experts say that starting with 15 minutes twice a day is optimal.

I recommend that you simply go to your seat twice a day for as many minutes as you can allow yourself and let that expand.

TIPS
If you have struggled to begin a regular practice in the past, merely find time and willingness to sit for 3, 5, or 10 minutes twice a day.

Sit in the same place and at approximately the same time(s) within your day. After just a few days, simply moving into that space will calm the central nervous system and the mind, allowing you to build a longer practice more readily.

Find an accountability buddy and start a practice together.

Delay your morning coffee or another pleasurable ritual until after your meditation.

Download an app that tracks your time.

Add meditation sessions to your to-do list. (most of us love checking things off of our list)

Drop me a comment and let me know how you get on with this. In the words of Jon Kabati-Zinn “It is indeed a radical act of love just to sit down and be quiet for a time by yourself. “ I would be honored to hear about your radical acts of love.

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